Archive for the ‘Cycling’ Category

Melburn-Roobaix :: Allez Allez!

Monday, July 24th, 2006

Brunswick Velodrome

I estimated about 80 riders lining up at the start, although apparently there were over 100 rider cards handed out at the first checkpoint. Such a great turnout and the weather was fantastic!

My shining moment was just after the 2nd checkpoint down at the wharf. I hopped over onto the unused railway track and motored up the side of what was left of the peleton, Vinokourov styles, leaving them in my dust. Of course I promptly ran out of gas and watched painfully as they motored right by me not one minute later. Also Vinokourov styles. :)

I’d climbed out of the self-imposed hurt-bag by the time we got to Albert Park and managed to put myself back into contention. One of the check-points was right outside the Agent Mad office and having been there many times before proved to be a massive advantage.

Over to South Yarra. This bit was really hard as the traffic over there was a nightmare. After nearly being taken out by a lowered family sedan of some variety I headed over to Richmond. Having an intimate knowledge of this area also proved to be an advantage and I was starting to get used to riding on cobbles.

But it doesn’t matter how good you are at riding on cobbles, if the road is blocked off by an angry tradesman’s ute then you’re kind of screwed. Upon performing some kind of acrobatic manoeuvre to get to the Collingwood checkpoint it was time to head over to Carlton.

I’d caught up to one of the leading groups by this stage. All the riders in this group stopped to double-check the map when we hit Northcote and I promptly scooted off to what I thought was the next checkpoint. The “Col d’ Ugly”. This was the most awesome cobbled climb ever (check the poor guy walking it). I posed for the compulsory polaroid and showering of talc powder at the summit, and was then informed that I’d missed one of the checkpoints and had to go back down the Col. Doh!

I had the missed-checkpoint sorted in a flash, but instead of taking the quickest/flattest route to Northcote Plaza with my shopping list I decided to go up the climb again, much to the bemusement of Andy and Co at the top. I wasn’t doing my overall position any favours, but hey, I was in a silly mood, I love hill climbs and the emphasis was on fun, right?

Seeing a slightly frantic young man covered in talc powder and muttering to himself while rushing up and down the isles of a supermarket was clearly a bit more than a few Saturday afternoon shoppers were capable of dealing with. I shouted “Allez, allez!” while making for the exit but girl at the checkout didn’t seem to share my enthusiasm.

With an overflowing musette it was time for the mad dash down Separation Street to Brunswick Velodrome. When I approached the railway crossing the gates came down in front of me. With no train in sight I safely scooted through and made for the finish. This is exactly what happened to the chasing group just before the finish in this year’s Paris-Roubaix (the race that the Melburn-Roobaix was modelled on).

They were disqualified. I guess I should have been too.

I rolled into Brunswick Velodrome in 10th place. The most fun I’ve had on a bike in a really long time. I want to do it again this weekend!

Alpe d’Huez

Tuesday, July 18th, 2006

Can’t wait for the final climb on tonight’s stage of the Tour de France.

It’s time to shine Cadel!

Melburn-Roobaix Alleycat

Monday, July 17th, 2006

Hell of the Northcote

Melbourne now has it’s own Paris-Roubaix.

This Saturday, July 22 (last day of Tour de France)
Start: 12pm @ Fed Square
Course will be run over Melbourne’s brutal pave, railway crossings, dirt tracks, and finishing with a lap of Brunswick Velodrome. Race maps provided. Riders will need to bring $10 and a musette to purchase items along the way.

Karma

Thursday, June 22nd, 2006

Some punk stole all the lights off my bike last night. I guess it’s my own fault for not putting them in my bag while I left my bike parked on the street.

Enjoy your new bike lights bud. I hope they guide you to hell.

New King In Town

Wednesday, February 1st, 2006

Plan to axe cars from city centre.

Like it or not, the car can no longer be king in Melbourne.

This is the most heart warming article I’ve read all week.

Lock it in Eddie

Wednesday, January 18th, 2006

It ocurred to me tonight how lame it is that “lock it in Eddie” has some how become an acceptable way of saying, “yes, that sounds wonderful”.

I’m sure I’ve said it myself a few times. Never again. Ever.

So anyway, whilst riding home from work tonight a car pulls up next to me at the traffic lights. The driver is yelling out my name but I don’t recognise him. He removes his sunglasses; I squint a lot; then I realise it’s a guy that I used to race with. I haven’t seen him in nearly 10 years. He only spotted me because he recognised my bike. Buggered if I can remember what bike he was riding 10 years ago, I didn’t say that though. :)

I picked up my camera and rode to the somewhat new Spencer Street Station to take some photos. I struck up a conversation with and old man who’d missed his train to Sydney. He gave me some girl advice then told me an incredibly sad story about his travels through Russia. All my photos turned out crap.

I made my way back home along Collins Street. I was travelling at a reasonable speed when the door of a black Mercedes (I think, perhaps a BMW, I can’t remember) opens in front of me. I am unable to swerve because there’s a taxi on my right, so I swiftly skid to a halt, stopping about a metre short of the driver. It’s fucking Eddie Maguire. I tried to think of a good insult but became distracted by the lush interior of his car. He cops my look-of-death and I continue on my merry way.

Next desitnation: Victoria Street. I don’t know why but I opted not to go to the same place I’ve been eating for the last 2 years. To cut a long story short, I’ve just found the best Wonton Noodle Soup joint in Melbourne, only few weeks before I’m set to move out of the neighbourhood.

Which brings us to now. I swear there was a small animal dying in my bedroom. Every few minutes I could hear this high pitched kind of moaning sound. Like a tiny kitten was gasping for it’s last breath of air or something. I spent at least half hour rummaging through everything until I realised it’s the fucking Instant Message client I just installed on my computer, trying to tell me that Karl is sending me messages.

Idiot!

If It’s Not Fixed It’s Broken

Monday, November 28th, 2005

After some 8 months I finally got my bike back from the mechanic. Despite the extremely long wait he did a wonderful job.

I forgot about the weird (and often disapproving) looks you get from the lycra-wearing-latte-sipping-weekend-roadies when you ride past them on a track bike. Like you’re too poor to afford a bike with brakes and more than one gear, or maybe that you just don’t know any better.

Newsflash to the dickheads that berrated me on Bridge Road on Sunday: No one cares if your $8k mostly-carbon-fibre bike is under the UCI weight limit or not. No, one.

[ now playing: songs: zero 7 - distractions ]

Critical Mass :: 10th Birthday Ride

Friday, November 25th, 2005

It’s a big week for birthdays. If you rode your bike to work today be sure to head along to Critical Mass tonight. Meet at 5:30pm at the State Library.

[ now playing: everything but the girl - downhill racer (kenny dope remix) ]

Heras Suspended

Wednesday, November 9th, 2005

Hrm. Roberto Heras has returned a positive A sample for EPO and has been suspended by Liberty Seguros.

4 time Veulta a Espana winner or not, it amazes me that these things are leaked before the result of the B sample is known. Something really (really) needs to be done to ensure the privacy of athletes is protected.

Rectracted

Sunday, October 9th, 2005

An interesting retraction by Dr Prentice Steffen, who recently made comments (in L’Equipe, where else?) about Lance Armstrong and doping. The former doctor of Armstrong’s US Postal team issued a statement saying:

I do not know Lance Armstrong personally and have I never witnessed him taking banned substances. I based my assumptions about Mr. Armstrong on rumours I had heard, instead of on anything remotely factual and I want to issue this public retraction of comments.

Second, my intentions in participating in the L’Equipe interview were not to impugn anyone’s character. I understood the purpose of the interview to be a discussion of the great strides being made by anti-doping agencies around the globe and the opportunity to improve testing for banned substances.

Unfortunately, the L’Equipe article overshadowed these issues and focused, instead, on my comments relating to specific athletes.

Props for the retraction. But seriously, anyone that hasn’t figured out by now that L’Equipe can’t be trusted deserves a little bit of public humiliation.